Self Esteem Part 3

Today I want to talk about Core Beliefs. These are deep seated beliefs that were formed when we were very young or through adolescence. I believe we all have these opinions of ourselves and that they can be both positive and negative. A belief in and of itself is defined as “any cognitive content held as true”. As shown in the picture above, a general belief is malleable; it can be shaped and re-shaped. A CORE belief, however, is sturdy and it is difficult to change its form. This phenomenon or remarkable development is the driving force behind our psyche, I believe. And it can either save or ruin us. Another definition of belief is that it is an “impression, feeling, notion, opinion a vague idea in which some confidence is placed”. So, a belief is an opinion that is held as true. If it is just an opinion, it can be changed. Even though it is stringent and carved deep into our minds, it can be changed. And THAT is a very important aspect of our negative core beliefs.

Hopefully not all the beliefs in the diagram above relate to you, but I am sure that everyone can find some. Read them over and write down the ones that you can relate to in a notebook or somewhere you will be able to find them because we are going to challenge these core beliefs one by one. Doing as much as we can on any given day or in any given moment as might be the case. I’m going to begin with some of my core beliefs that come under Defectiveness.

• I am a failure
• I am unattractive
• There’s something wrong with me
• I am a bad person

Now I’m going to put these beliefs into a chart form, very much like this:

I want you to notice that the replacement statements are not all or nothing. Words like sometimes, can be, some, several etc. are used in order to make the new beliefs more believable to myself and others. Try and make up a chart for yourself, changing your negative core beliefs into more accurate opinions of yourself. Opinions that are likely closer to the truth than the negative thoughts you usually place on yourself. I don’t think this is an easy exercise, but it is worth trying and worth writing down. Get rid of those nasty self critical statements and build yourself up for a change. You deserve to be happy. You deserve to be recognized. You can and will be successful!